This morning all my children decided to ask for a snack at the same time....and my reply without thinking was, "your request will be processed in the order it was received" Really...have I been on hold lately? I honestly had to laugh a bit at myself, and then I started thinking about how the Lord always hear us, ALL of us, all the time. For those that are in Christ Jesus, we can pray at any time, in fact God tells us to "Pray without ceasing" 1 Thes 5:17. As I'm praying without ceasing, so might another brother or sister...and yet God hears us all. I think that the best word I can muster up is, humbling.
Lately we've been dealing with a lot of behavioral issues with my eldest son. Which primarily falls on my shoulders being that I am home with them. It's tough and taxing, and at times I just pick up a book just to escape because it seems too much. Finally, a few days ago when I thought I was going to lose the last bit of sanity I was struggling to hold onto....I shared my concerns with a friend...who I can absolutely trust to pray.
She shared with me out of Job 26, which was just an amazing blessing and helped me to refocus and regroup, my prayers stopped being about changing my sons' behavior...and more of crying out to the Lord to change me, change my responses...give me the grace to not grow weary in doing good, but to persevere to His glory! Parenting is beyond tough, it's indescribable. If I desire to reach my hearts' of my children, correct behavior will not be enough...Christ in them directing their lives must be my desire above my selfishness to just want well behaved children. I can not fathom parenting without Christ, much like I can not fathom marriage without Christ. Christ and His word.....for me is like oxygen, I can not breathe without Him or His Word (which He is, John 1:14). I can not, and nor would I want to, the depths of my heart are at best deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9) and nothing good dwells within me except that which is of God (Romans 7:18).
So, this morning as I was processing my children's requests, I began to think about God as my heavenly Father doesn't have to prioritize my requests verses another child's requests, He hears it all and responds to us all, in His time and for His glory. I began to think on His word and His goodness, and how He never changes, and sometimes I've felt recently as I've been dealing with my son that He seemingly was just not hearing my prayers about my son. Through His word:
"How you have helped him who has no power! How you have saved the arm that has no strength! How you have counseled him who has no wisdom and plentifully declared sound knowledge!" Job 26:2-3
I just dropped it all at His feet, my self centered prayers for changed behavior without regard to a heart change, because that is the easy way out. The Lord has stopped those, He's renewed a passion within me to cry out for my sons' heart....and revealing to me that my finite mind can never process all that God is, and the older I get and the more "I know" the less I really know, because God alone is God! I have no power to change my son, I must obey the Lord and discipline my children, I must love God before them as an example, but I must rest on the power of Christ in me to do this. I am completely powerless, I have no strength, I have no wisdom...but I have a Savior who imparts that to me as I ask (James 1:5, Job 26:4). I can trust that God will through Christ give me the strength, power and wisdom to "survive" this to His glory!
I'd challenge you sisters, to ask yourself...Am I praying for my loved ones to change so that it will make my life easier, or am I willing to simply trust God and pray for His work in both my heart and theirs, trusting that that change may be in myself or them or both, but whoever is changed it will be for the glory of God!
It's hard to not suggest the seemingly perfect solution to the Lord at times in prayer....but His ways are not our ways nor are His thoughts ours, thanks be to God, they are MUCH higher (Is.55:8-9)
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